Q:The first time I felt the urge for sex, I used “fingering” and found it exciting. Now it has become a habit. However, I never experienced bleeding. Is this normal? Have I lost my virginity?

I want to stop this habit. “Nandidiri na ako sa aking sarili” (I feel so Dirty). Memorizing Bible passages doesn’t seem to help.

A:Virginity “is a state or quality of not having experienced any sexual intercourse. “However, virginity is a lot more than an intact hymen. Strenuous activities may stretch or rupture a girl’s hymen, but this does not necessarily mean that she has lost her virginity.

In fingering, it depends upon how deep the finger penetration had been. See a trusted doctor for check-up. For your peace of mind.

Normally, teenage girls go through this stage. However, it this has become a habit, it’s not normal anymore.

Habits are hard to break. But “you have no obligations whatsoever to your old nature to do what it begs you to do. For it through the power of the Holy Spirit you crush it and its evil deeds, you live” (Romans 8:12, 13, Living Bible).

God understands your guilty feelings. Talk to Him. The result of your determination to cut off the habit may not be immediate, but His help is sure.

To make time meaningful, it must be positive or quality time.

Every minute that you spend with your child is significant. You’re on stage, so to speak, influencing them by your words and behavior—whether you want to or not.

Listen a moment. The “scene” is talking lace next door. (Or is it?)

“Lisa, breakfast’s ready. Quit your dilly-dallying, and come right now.”

Silence.

“Lisa, if you don’t come this minute, I’m going to give you a spanking you’ll never forget.”

Lisa wanders in slowly with her shoes in her hand.

“Cant you ever come when you’re first called? You’re going to make me late for my meeting, and it’s all going to be your fault. Why do you have your shoes in your hands? Shoes are to be put on your feet.”

“Hungry. Drink your milk.” Silence. “I said drink your milk, not spill it all over the table. How can you be so clumsy?”

Continue reading…

Q:

I’m 21, he’s 30. We’ve been steady the past three years. He promised marriage, but after two years pa daw. Will I wait?

However, I’ve never been introduced to his family. He also has a child with a woman who works at a big department store in Pangasinan. I confronted him about it. He made a confession, asked forgiveness, and suggested that we get the child. I refused.

We engage in premarital sex. For protection, I use contraceptive pills. I told him to get me pregnant, but he said it’s not the right time yet. Does this mean he does not love me?

A:

Be thankful your boyfriend refused to get you pregnant. And this is not just mere question of whether he loves you or not.

Remember, he got another girl pregnant, but did not marry her. We’d never know what unfulfilled promises he also made to that girl. You wouldn’t like that to happen to you. Would you? And he’s right-the only right and legal time for you to get pregnant is after marriage.

Now with premarital sex. God intended sex to be enjoyed within the context of marriage. Most men today still want to marry virgins who are not “soiled” or “secondhand goods.” Psychologists believe boys still classify girls as bad or good depending on their virginity. And with the now-rampant AIDS disease, who knows you’d be the next victim? When you sleep with a man, you may be actually sleeping with his previous sexual partners.

Learn to say No! Before you get pregnant. Using contraceptive pills is not 100 percent safe. The best contraceptive against pregnancy is abstinence.

Is he worth the wait? You should first make clear your doubts:

Why does he not introduce you to his family? What are his plans for his child? Are you sure he really loves you and will marry you in two years’ time?

If you find it difficult to resolve you problem, look up to God and claim this promise, “You [God] are my refuge and shield, and your promises are my only source of hope” (Psalm 119:114, Living Bible).

Young children shouldn’t use more than the recommended “pea-size” amount of toothpaste, and they shouldn’t swallow it. While fluoride is important in protecting teeth, the large amounts found in toothpaste, if swallowed frequently, can discolor permanent tooth enamel. Children are more likely to swallow toothpastes flavored to appeal them.

As we all know, studying at school can cause stress and depression to students. Because of overwhelming tasks to do, their body experiences fatigue and is vulnerable to diseases. Some students sacrifice the time to eat their meals on time only to accomplish their tasks. Because of this, some of them gets ulcer. Others don’t mind whether it is raining or not. They expose their selves to intense heat or to pouring rain and thus become prone to sickness. So for all of students, graduation day will be the day when tiring and exhausting days will become over and that it is the day for harvesting the fruits of your hardships.

Continue reading…

Should you worry if your children consume drinks containing caffeine? There are no established guidelines on caffeine consumption for children, says a Baylor College of Medicine professor. But on a pound–for-pound basis, 40-pound child drinking one 12-ounce cola a day is consuming about as much caffeine as a 150-pound adult drinking two cups of coffee. Caffeine stimulates the central nervous system and in adults causes nervousness, irritability, insomnia, and disturbances of heart rate and rhythm. Iced coffees and soft drinks are popular children. Children’s Nutrition research Center.

Even with preventive measures, accidents can always happen inside our homes. The threat of thefts and other bad elements is also always there. It is an imperative for us to be sure that our family is safe even when we are away working. Crime rates are at all time high nowadays so the need for reliable home security system calls us to be proactive.

Continue reading…

Given incorrectly, drugs may be ineffective or harmful. Parents should fully understand a particular drug, what it will do, what reactions to look for, when doses should be given, and the consequences of missing a dose.

Always check over-the-counter (OTC) drugs for product tampering. Read labels. No OTC should be given to children under two years old without a doctor’s permission. Follow doctor’s recommendation for dosage.

Right dosage given at the right time for OTC and prescription drugs is very important as reactions and overdosing can occur. Read measuring instruments carefully. These include syringes, droppers, cylindrical dosing spoon and dosage cup. Remove the cap from oral and hypodermic syringes if using them for oral medication administration.

Your kitchen may be sparklingly clean but that does not mean you are safe from disease-causing microorganisms. Microbiologists from the University of Arizona found out that salmonella and staphylococcus, the most common causes of food-borne diseases in the US, are present in dirty dishcloths that are used in wiping kitchen tops where uncooked meats were previously placed. These dirty dishcloths are then used elsewhere, spreading pathogens everywhere in the kitchen.

To stop this, people should clean their dishcloths with hot water before using them again.

Q:

I’ve been living in with a man for more than two years already. This setup brought disgrace to my family especially to my father who is a priest. But neither was nor blessed with children.

Each time I bring up the marriage issue with him, he gives all the alibis he can think of.

Many people said I wasted my life because of this man. He has a job while I still have to finish my studies. I used to receive financial help as a government scholar, but it was cut off because I kept on changing courses. I also worked with an NGO and wrote for a local paper. All these I give up so I could take care of him. Yet he won’t even give me descent marriage.

Yes, we continue to have sexual relations. But I now want to leave him. My parents don’t want to intervene. They say that as an adult I should know what to do. Please help.

A:

If you aren’t currently staying with your family you may choose to go back and live with him. Enlist the support in helping you avoid seeing your live-in partner.

If your living with them, how about trying to seek employment or continuing your studies far from your home? And yes, keep sexual intimacy out of your relationship. This is an area of a relationship that makes it very difficult for a lady to simply walk out and close the door on a relationship. Keep distance from him, the lesser to see him, chances are you’d more likely forget him in due time.

Ponder upon what lies ahead you should continue this illicit relationship. You’re just a mistress; your child (should you have one) will be illegitimate unless he marries you.

Proverbs 6:20-24 talks about your parents’ pieces of advice as beams of light directing you to a good life. Take this counsel to heart.

I believe your parents’ heart bleed for you. Don’t hesitate to approach them. They won’t turn you away.